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Praca domowa :.: prosze o sprawdzenie opowiadania

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prosze o sprawdzenie opowiadania
dominikahh
newbie

Dołączył:19 Gru 2011
Posty:1
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It was a dark night in December. It was snowing so hard that everything was white. I and my friend Mike were walking in a park. We were spending a really nice time together. There was nobody except for us.
Suddenly I saw two dark shapes going near us. They saw me and Mike and started screaming something to us. I was frightened to death. I think Mike was afraid too.
Those two people began following us. We started running away, but they were very fast. They were screaming all the time. We didn’t know what to do. I thought that they wanted to kill us. It would be terrible. My mother was waiting for me at home and I wouldn’t come back that day. We still were running away, but there was very icy so we couldn’t run as fast as we wanted to. They had knifes and started screaming louder.
“They will kill us, Mike.” I said.
“Yes, I know. I can’t help it. I’m sorry.” he replied.
Then those two people were running next to us and laughing.

We realized that was just a stupid joke. We were so happy. We laughed with relief and walked toward my home. Now, we don’t go out at night. The pure joy of being alive makes us really happy.
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marchefkka
newbie

Dołączył:27 Gru 2011
Posty:23
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It was a dark, December night. (tylko sugestia, bylo ok). It was snowing so hard that everything was white. My friend Mike and I were walking in a park. We were having a really nice time together. There was nobody there except for us.
Suddenly I saw two dark shapes walking (nie going) near us. They saw me and Mike and started screaming something to us. I was frightened to death. I think Mike was afraid too.
Those two people began following us. We started running away, but they were very fast. They were screaming all the time. We didn’t know what to do. I thought that they wanted to kill us. That would be terrible. My mother would be waiting for me at home and I wouldn’t come back that day. We were still running away, but it was very icy so we couldn’t run as fast as we wanted to. They had knives and started screaming louder.
“They will kill us, Mike.” I said.
“Yes, I know. I can’t help it. I’m sorry.” he replied.
Then those two people were running next to us and laughing.

We realized that was just a stupid joke. We were so happy. We laughed with relief and walked towards my home. Now, we don’t go out at night. The pure joy of being alive makes us really happy.

Super!
Praca domowa : prosze o sprawdzenie opowiadania
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