10 Things I Hate About You
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EXT. SCHOOL COURTYARD - DAY Groups of students stand around. Michael and Cameron continue their walk. MICHAEL (Continuing) To the left we have the coffee kids. COFFEE KID 1 Whoa! (spills his coffee) COFFEE KID 2 That was Costa Rican, butthead! MICHAEL Very edgy. Don’t make any sudden moves around them. They step down and pass a table full of white boys with dreadlocks and prerequisite Jamaican berets. MICHAEL And these delusionals are the White Rasta. Uh, they’re big Marley fans. They think they're black. Semi-political, but mostly... CAMERON Smoke a lot of weed? MICHAEL Yeah. They now approach a few kids dressed as urban cowboys. MICHAEL (continuing) These guys... CAMERON Wait wait. Let me guess. Cowboys? MICHAEL Yeah but, the closest they’ve come to a cow is Macdonald’s. (laughs at his own lame joke) Hah hah...Macdonalds! They approach a group of studious-looking teens who are bent over textbooks at a table. MICHAEL These are your future MBAs- We're all Ivy League accepted. Yuppie greed is back, my friend. (to the group) Hey guys. How ya doin’? One of them looks annoyed and mutters something about “Bogie”. It is, in fact BOGIE LEVENSTEIN himself, leader of the academic geeks. Why does he mutter his own name? Maybe he just likes to speak in the third person... MICHAEL (continuing as they walk away) Yesterday I was their god. CAMERON What happened? MICHAEL Bogie Levenstein started a rumor that I...that I buy my Izods at an outlet mall. CAMERON So they kicked you out? MICHAEL Hostile takeover. But don’t worry. They’ll pay. Now over here... CAMERON (Suddenly distracted) Oh my god! BIANCA, a young cream puff of a blonde girl, walks by in slow motion. Cameron is in deep smit. CAMERON (Continues) What group is she in? MICHAEL The “don’t even think about it” group. That’s Bianca Stratford. A sophomore. CAMERON I burn! I pine! I perish! MICHAEL Of course you do. You know, she’s beautiful and deep. Pure. Bianca walks with her friend, CHASTITY, a cute and seemingly less loquacious version of herself. BIANCA Yup, see, there’s a difference between “like” and “love”. Because I like my Sketchers, but I love my Prada backpack. BIANCA’S FRIEND But I love my Sketchers. BIANCA That’s because you don’t have a Prada backpack. BIANCA’S FRIEND Ohhh! MICHAEL (To Cameron) Listen. Forget her. Incredibly uptight father, and it’s a widely known fact that the Stratford sisters aren’t allowed to date. CAMERON Uh huh...yeah. [What if?] INT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY A room full of bored seniors doodle and stare off into space. MR. MORGAN, an educated, no-nonsense man in his early thirties presides. MR. MORGAN Okay then. What did everyone think of The Sun Also Rises? A girl raises her hand and offers her appraisal. ROMANTIC GIRL I loved it. (She sighs) It was sooo romantic. Kat, the girl we saw as we entered the school, is wearing a camo top in preparation for her daily war against high school ignorance. KAT (disgusted) Romantic? Hemingway?! He was an abusive alcoholic misogynist who squandered half his life hanging around Picasso trying to nail his leftovers. The other students roll their eyes. JOEY DONNER, a slicked-back knock-off of Slater from Saved By The Bell makes fun of her from his row. JOEY As opposed to a bitter self-righteous hag who has no friends? A few giggles. Kat fumes from her seat without looking back. MR. MORGAN Pipe down, Chachie. KAT I guess in this society being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time. What about Sylvia Platt or Charlotte Bronte or Simone de Beauvoir? Patrick suddenly steps into the classroom, late. PATRICK What’d I miss? KAT The oppressive patriarchal values that dictate our education. PATRICK Good. (immediately turns and leaves) MR. MORGAN (Shouting after him) Hey, hey! JOEY Uh, Mr. Morgan. Is there any chance we could get Kat to take her Mydol before she comes to class? More snickers from the class. MR. MORGAN Some day you’re gonna get bitch-slapped and I’m not gonna do a thing to stop it. And Kat. I want to thank you for your point of view. She smiles to herself, her social indignation justified. MR. MORGAN (continuing) I know how difficult it must be for you to overcome all those years of upper middle class suburban oppression. It must be tough. She deflates and becomes bitter again. MR. MORGAN (continuing) But the next time you storm around the PTA crusading for better lunch meat, or whatever it is you white girls complain about, ask them why they can’t buy a book written by a black man! Two of the White Rasta kids from earlier take up his cry of inequality. WHITE RASTA CHORUS That’s right mon! MR. MORGAN Don’t even get me started on you two! They grumble apologetically and quickly shut up. Kat is fuming again. KAT Anything else? MR. MORGAN Yeah. Go to the office. You’re pissing me off. KAT What?! Mr. Morgan! MR. MORGAN Later! Kat gets up in a tiff and on her way out hits Joey in the face with her books. abusive- obelżywy, obraźliwy apologetically- przepraszająco appraisal- szacunek, ocean, oszacowanie butthead- idiota, dureń crusade- walka deflate- wypuszczać powietrze delusional- osoba z urojeniami, pomyleniec distract- rozpraszać doodle- bazgrać, gryzmolić edgy- nerwowy, podekscytowany geek- kujon; dziwak giggle- chichot, chichotać grumble- szemrać, sarkać, pomrukiwać hostile- wrogi indignation- wzburzenie, oburzenie inequality- nierówność justify- uzasadniać, usprawiedliwiać knock-off- tania kopia, marna koia lame- marny, kiepski leftovers- resztki loquacious- gadatliwy misogynist- mizogin mutter- mruczeć, mamrotać perish- niszczeć, rozpadać się pine- pragnąć, usychać z pragnienia lub tęsknoty pipe down- zamknij się pissing somebody off- wkurzać kogoś prerequisite- warunek wstępny preside- przewodniczyć PTA - Parent Teacher Association pure- czysty, niewinny rumor- plotka slicked-back- przylizany do tyłu, z nażelowanymi włosami smit- porażony snicker- parskać śmiechem, parsknięcie sophomore- student drugiego roku (am) spill- rozlać squander- trwonić studious- pilny, pracowity takeover- przejęcie, zagarnięcie tiff- sprzeczka uptight- nerwowy weed- trawka, marihuana The Sun Also Rises- “Słońce też wschodzi” (tytuł powieści Hemingway’a)
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