Annie Hall
|
EXT. BEEKMAN THEATER-DAY
Alvy stands in front of glass doors of theater, the ticket taker behind him just inside the glass doors. The sounds of city traffic, car horns honking, can be heard while he looks around waiting for Annie. A man in a black leather jacket, walking past the theater, stops in front of Alvy. He looks at him, then moves away. He stops a few steps farther and turns around to look at Alvy again. Alvy looks away, then back at the man. The man continues to stare. Alvy scratches his head, looking for Annie and trying not to notice the man. The man, still staring, walks back to Alvy. 1ST MAN Hey, you on television? ALVY (Nodding his head) No. Yeah, once in a while. You know, like occasionally. 1ST MAN What's your name? ALVY (Clearing his throat) You wouldn't know it. It doesn't matter. What's the difference? 1ST MAN You were on ... uh, the ... uh, the Johnny Carson, right? ALVY Once in a while, you know. I mean, you know, every now- 1ST MAN What's your name? Alvy is getting more and more uneasy as the man talks; more and more people move through the doors of the theater. ALVY (Nervously) I'm ... I'm, uh, I'm Robert Redford. 1ST MAN (Laughing) Come on. ALVY Alvy Singer. It was nice nice ... Thanks very much ... for everything. They shake hands and Alvy pats the man's arm. The man in turn looks over his shoulder and motions to another man. All excited now, he points to Alvy and calls out. Alvy looks impatient. 1ST MAN Hey! 2ND MAN (Off screen) What? 1ST MAN This is Alvy Singer! ALVY Fellas ... you know-Jesus! Come on! 1ST MAN (Overlapping, ignoring Alvy) This guy's on television! Alvy Singer, right? Am I right? ALVY (Overlapping 1st man) Gimme a break, will you, gimme a break. Jesus Christ! 1ST MAN (Still ignoring Alvy's protestations) This guy's on television. ALVY I need a large polo mallet! 2ND MAN (Moving into the screen) Who's on television? 1ST MAN This guy, on the Johnny Carson show. ALVY (Annoyed) Fellas, what is this-a meeting o' the teamsters? You know.. . 2ND MAN (Also ignoring Alvy) What program? 1ST MAN Can I have your autograph? ALVY You don't want my autograph. 1ST MAN (Overlapping, Alvy's speech) Yeah, I do. It's for my girl friend. Make it out to Ralph. ALVY (Taking the matchbook and pen and writing) Your girl friend's name is Ralph? 1ST MAN It's for my brother. (To passersby) Alvy Singer! Hey! This is Alvy- 2ND MAN (To Alvy, overlapping 1st man's speech) You really Alvy Singer, the ... the TV star? Nodding his head yes, Alvy shoves 2nd man aside and moves to the curb of the sidewalk. The two men follow, still talking over the traffic noise. 1ST MAN -Singer! 2ND MAN Alvy Singer over here! A cab moves into the frame and stops by the curb. Alvy moves over to it about to get in. ALVY (Overlapping the two men and stuttering) I-i-i-i-it's all right, fellas. (As Alvy opens the cab door, the two men still behind him, Annie gets out) Jesus, what'd you do, come by way of the Panama Canal? ANNIE (Overlapping Alvy) Alright, alright, I'm in a bad mood, okay? Annie closes the cab door and she and Alvy move over to the ticket booth of the theater as they continue to talk. ALVY Bad mood? I'm standing with the cast of "The Godfather." ANNIE You're gonna hafta learn to deal with it. ALVY Deal! I'm dealing with two guys named Cheech! ANNIE Okay. (They move into the ticket line, still talking. ) Please, I have a headache, all right? ALVY Hey, you are in a bad mood. You-you- you must be getting your period. ANNIE I'm not getting my period. Jesus, every time anything out of the ordinary happens, you think that I'm getting my period! They move over to the ticket counter, people in front of them buying tickets and walking off screen. ALVY (Gesturing) A li-little louder. I think one of them may have missed it! (To the ticket clerk) H'm, has the picture started yet? TICKET CLERK It started two minutes ago. ALVY (Hitting his hand on the counter) That's it! Forget it! I-I can't go in. ANNIE Two minutes, Alvy. ALVY (Overlapping Annie) No, I'm sorry, I can't do it. We-we've blown it already. I-you know, uh, I-I can't go in in the middle. ANNIE In the middle? (Alvy nods his head yes and lets out an exasperated sigh) We'll only miss the titles. They're in Swedish. ALVY You wanna get coffee for two hours or something? We'll go next- ANNIE Two hours? No, u-uh, I'm going in. I'm going in. She moves past the ticket clerk. ALVY (Waving to Annie) Go ahead. Good-bye. Annie moves back to Alvy and takes his arm. ANNIE Look, while we're talking we could be inside, you know that? ALVY (Watching people with tickets move past them) Hey, can we not stand here and argue in front of everybody, 'cause I get embarrassed. ANNIE Alright. All right, all right, so whatta you wanna do? ALVY I don't know now. You-you wanna go to another movie? (Annie nods her head and shrugs her shoulders disgustedly as Alvy, gesturing with his hand, looks at her) So let's go see “The Sorrow and the Pity”. ANNIE Oh, come on, we've seen it. I'm not in the mood to see a four-hour documentary on Nazis. ALVY Well, I'm sorry, I-I can't ... I-I-I've gotta see a picture exactly from the start to the finish, 'cause-'cause I'm anal. ANNIE (Laughing now) H'h, that's a polite word for what you are. INT. THEATER LOBBY. A lined-up crowd of ticket holders waiting to get into the theater, Alvy and Annie among them. MAN IN LINE (Loudly to his companion right behind Alvy and Annie) We saw the Fellini film last Tuesday. It is not one of his best. It lacks a cohesive structure. You know, you get the feeling that he's not absolutely sure what it is he wants to say. 'Course, I've always felt he was essentially a-a technical film maker. Granted, “La Strada” was a great film. Great in its use of negative energy more than anything else. But that simple cohesive core ... Alvy, reacting to the man's loud monologue, starts to get annoyed, while Annie begins to read her newspaper. ALVY (Overlapping the man's speech) I'm-I'm-I'm gonna have a stroke. ANNIE (Reading) Well, stop listening to him. MAN IN LINE (Overlapping Alvy and Annie) You know, it must need to have had its leading from one thought to another. You know what I'm talking about? ALVY (Sighing) He's screaming his opinions in my ear. MAN IN LINE Like all that “Juliet of the Spirits” or “Satyricon”, I found it incredibly ... indulgent. You know, he really is. He's one of the most indulgent film makers. He really is- ALVY (Overlapping) Key word here is "indulgent." MAN IN LINE (Overlapping) -without getting ... well, let's put it this way ... ALVY (To Annie, who is still reading, overlapping the man in line who is still talking) What are you depressed about? ANNIE I missed my therapy. I overslept. ALVY How can you possibly oversleep? ANNIE The alarm clock. ALVY You know what a hostile gesture that is to me? ANNIE I know-because of our sexual problem, right? ALVY Hey, you ... everybody in line at the New Yorker has to know our rate of intercourse? MAN IN LINE - It's like Samuel Beckett, you know- I admire the technique but he doesn't ... he doesn't hit me on a gut level. ALVY (To Annie) I'd like to hit this guy on a gut level. The man in line continues his speech all the while Alvy and Annie talk. ANNIE Stop it, Alvy! ALVY Well, he's spitting on my neck! You know, he's spitting on my neck when he talks. MAN IN LINE And then, the most important thing of all is a comedian's vision. ANNIE And you know something else? You know, you're so egocentric that if I miss my therapy you can think of it in terms of how it affects you! MAN IN LINE (Lighting a cigarette while he talks) Gal gun-shy is what it is. ALVY (Reacting again to the man in line) Probably on their first date, right? MAN IN LINE (Still going on) It's a narrow view. ALVY Probably met by answering an ad in the New York Review of Books. "Thirtyish academic wishes to meet woman who's interested in Mozart, James Joyce and sodomy." (He sighs; then to Annie) Whatta you mean, our sexual problem? ANNIE Oh! ALVY I-I-I mean, I'm comparatively normal for a guy raised in Brooklyn. ANNIE Okay, I'm very sorry. My sexual problem! Okay, my sexual problem! Huh? The man in front of them turns to look at them, then looks away. ALVY I never read that. That was-that was Henry James, right? Novel, uh, the sequel to “Turn of the Screw”? My Sexual ... MAN IN LINE (Even louder now) It's the influence of television. Yeah, now Marshall McLuhan deals with it in terms of it being a-a high, uh, high intensity, you understand? A hot medium ... as opposed to a ... ALVY (More and more aggravated) What I wouldn't give for a large sock o' horse manure. MAN IN LINE ... as opposed to a print ... Alvy steps forward, waving his hands in frustration, and stands facing the camera. ALVY (Sighing and addressing the audience) What do you do when you get stuck in a movie line with a guy like this behind you? I mean, it's just maddening! The man in line moves toward Alvy. Both address the audience now. MAN IN LINE Wait a minute, why can't I give my opinion? It's a free country! ALVY I mean, d- He can give you- Do you hafta give it so loud? I mean, aren't you ashamed to pontificate like that? And-and the funny part of it is, M-Marshall McLuhan, you don't know anything about Marshall McLuhan's...work! MAN IN LINE (Overlapping) Wait a minute! Really? Really? I happen to teach a class at Columbia called "TV Media and Culture"! So I think that my insights into Mr. McLuhan-well, have a great deal of validity. ALVY Oh, do yuh? MAN IN LINE Yes. ALVY Well, that's funny, because I happen to have Mr. McLuhan right here. So ... so, here, just let me-I mean, all right. Come over here ... a second. Alvy gestures to the camera which follows him and the man in line to the back of the crowded lobby. He moves over to a large stand-up movie poster and pulls Marshall McLuban from behind the poster. MAN IN LINE Oh. ALVY (To McLuban) Tell him. MCLUHAN (To the man in line) I hear-I heard what you were saying. You-you know nothing of my work. You mean my whole fallacy is wrong. How you ever got to teach a course in anything is totally amazing. ALVY (To the camera) Boy, if life were only like this! VOCABULARY theater- (Am)- kino horn - klakson honk - (o klaksonie) trąbić scratch - drapać clear one’s throat - odchrząkiwać pat - poklepywać, klepać motion - czynic gest, dawać znak impatient - niecierpliwy fella - facet, kupel, gość gimme - give me polo mallet - kij do gry w polo teamster - kierowca ciężarówki shove aside - odpychać, spychać na bok stutter - jąkać się period - okres picture - film exasperated - poirytowany, rozdrażniony disgustedly - z oburzeniem, z odrazą documentary - film dokumentalny cohesive - spójny granted - pewnie, że; jasne; oczywiście core - rdzeń, jądro indulgent - pobłażliwy oversleep - zaspać hostile - wrogi rate - stopień, rodzaj intercourse - stosunek seksualny on a gut level - na najgłębszym poziomie odczuwania spit - pluć comparatively - stosunkowo as opposed to - w przeciwieństwie do aggravated - poirytowany manure - nawóz pontificate - wypowiadać się autorytatywnie insight - wgląd (w coś), pojęcie (o czymś) validity - ważność, słuszność fallacy - błąd logiczny TEST
Tylko zarejestrowani użytkownicy mogą pisać komentarze. Zarejestruj się lub zaloguj. | ||
| « poprzedni artykuł | następny artykuł » |
|---|
