Man on the Moon
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INT. KAUFMAN HOUSE, HALLWAY - 1957 - DAY Stanley hurries up to Andy's shut door. We hear little Andy doing VOICES. ANDY (as WORRIED GIRL) But professor, why are the monsters growing so big? (now as BRITISH PROFESSOR) It's something in the jungle water. I need to crack the secret code. Stanley rolls his eyes. He opens the door... INT. KAUFMAN HOUSE, ANDY'S ROOM - 1957 - DAY ANDY, 8, performing for the wall. Andy is happy and enthusiastic... as long as he's acting. ANDY (as BRITISH PROFESSOR) Maybe I should talk to the natives. (as dancing NATIVES) Shoom boom boo ba! Shoom boom boo ba -- STANLEY Andy! ANDY (startled) Oh! The boy suddenly turns off, becoming introverted... awkward. Frustrated, Stanley stares at his son. STANLEY Andy, this has to stop. Our house isn't a television station. There is not a camera in that wall. Andy glances over at the wall. STANLEY (trying to cope) Son... listen to me. It isn't healthy. You should be outside, playing sports. ANDY But I've got a sports show. Championship wrestling, at five. STANLEY (he blows his top) You know that's not what I meant! Look, I'm gonna put my foot down! No more playing alone. You wanna perform, you GOTTA have an audience! ANDY (he points at the wall) B-but I have them. STANLEY No! That is NOT an audience! That is PLASTER! An audience is people made of flesh! They -- live and breathe! Got it?! Andy thinks, considering his options. Then, he nods. INT. NY NIGHTCLUB - 1975 The club is empty. At the bar, the manager cleans up. Andy eagerly comes over. Offstage, his presence is soft, placid -- his voice barely above a whisper. ANDY So, Mr. Besserman, same slot tomorrow...? MANAGER (awkward) Eh, I dunno... Andy. I'm... thinkin' of letting you go... ANDY You're firing me?? You don't even pay me! MANAGER Look -- I don't wanna seem insulting. But... your act is like amateur hour: Singalongs... puppets... playing records… ANDY What do you want? "Take my wife, please"?? MANAGER Sure! Comedy! Make jokes about the traffic. Do impressions. Maybe a little blue material... ANDY I don't swear. I -- I don't do what everyone else does! MANAGER Well, everyone else gets this place cookin'! Pal, it's hard for me to move the booze when you're singin' "Pop Goes The Weasel." Andy stares, disheartened. MANAGER I'm sorry. You're finished here. Andy starts crying. The manager is dumbfounded. He doesn't know what to do. Tears are rolling pitifully down Andy's cheeks. The manager is confused -- totally disoriented. Shamed, Andy covers his face, then runs out. Silence. The manager stares after him... having no idea what just happened. EXT. NY NIGHTCLUB - 1975 - NIGHT Sobbing Andy leaves. He steps onto the sidewalk -- and IMMEDIATELY STOPS CRYING. Just like that. Andy lifts his big case and starts walking. Andy shakes his head angrily. He turns down a dark street, hurrying alone through an unsavory New York neighborhood. But then... TWO MEN appear... silently approaching. Andy stops uncertainly -- debating whether to turn around. But in that second -- the thugs are upon him, glaring menacingly. THUG #1 Give us your wallet. Andy stares fearfully. An anxious moment. He thinks... considering his options. Then, he suddenly stammers in a thick FOREIGN ACCENT. ANDY (AS FOREIGN MAN) I -- doo not unterstand!! THUG #1 Give us your money! ANDY (AS FOREIGN MAN) What?? What mooney? Abu daboo! I do not have mooney! The thugs glance at each other. ANDY (AS FOREIGN MAN) Pleaze! I just move to America yezterday! I do not know! THUG #1 What's in the case? ANDY (AS FOREIGN MAN) NO! Eeet, eet is just perzonal trifles from my homeland -- THUG #2 Shut up! Gimme that thing! The guy snatches the case. He impulsively BREAKS the lock... and clothes and records fall out. The thugs are dismayed. THUG #1 Goddamn immigrants! THUG #2 This guy's pathetic. Let's go. Harsh glances. They angrily turn and leave. Andy takes a nervous breath, then starts picking his things off the street. He shouts after the guys: ANDY (AS FOREIGN MAN) Tank you veddy much...! VOCABULARY crack - łamać native - krajowiec, tubylec startled - przestraszony, zaskoczony turn off - wyłączać, zamykać; tu: wyłączyć się, zamknąć się w sobie introverted - introwertyczny, zamknięty w sobie awkward - niezgrabny, niezręczny, zakłopotany frustrated - sfrustrowany stare - gapić się, wpatrywać się glance- zerkać, rzucać okiem; spojrzenie championship - mistrzostwa wrestling- zapasy (dyscyplina sportowa) blow one’s top- zdenerwować się put one’s foot down - wyperswadować coś komuś, wymóc coś na kimś audience - publiczność flesh - ciało, mięso got it? - „zrozumiałeś?”, “jasne?”, „dotarło?” nod - skinąć głową eagerly - ochoczo, gorliwie come over- podchodzić offstage - poza sceną placid- łagodny, pogodny barely - zaledwie slot - wolny czas, okienko, tu: czas na występ I dunno- I don’t know fire - wyrzucić kogoś z pracy insulting - obraźliwy singalong- śpiewanie przy włączonym nagraniu puppet- kukiełka, pacynka pal - koleś, facet booze - alkohol (pot.) disheartened - zniechęcony, przygnębiony dumbfounded - oniemiały pitifully - żałośnie confused - zakłopotany, zmieszany sob - łkać blue- tu: pornograficzny unsavory - nieprzyjemny, podejrzany approach - nadchodzić debate - zastanawiać się thug - zbir, bandzior glare - patrzeć ze złością menacingly - grożnie, ze złością harsh- szorstki stammer - jąkać się gimme - give me snatch - wyrwać dismayed -rozczarowany, rozżalony goddamn - cholerny pathetic - żałosny TEST
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